3 things you can do to have a great sick day

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Daily Blog Tips is sponsoring a contest based around the number ‘3′. This is my entry. As this is a blog about freedom from the corporate world, these are some tips I make use of at least seven or eight times a year.

1. Plan ahead. When Ferris Beuller called in sick, he didn’t just wake up one morning and say to himself, “Ferris, this would be a good day to not go to school. So what are we going to do today?” He planned ahead. He knew what he wanted to do, and he knew how, when, where, and with whom he wanted to do it. You should make a list of at least three important things you want to do with your free day. Try not to do the same things you do every weekend; that’s just squandering a sick day. If you want to stay home, great. Stock up the fridge with your favorite garbage the night before, or make sure you have cash to order a pizza or three. If you’re going out, make sure your tank is filled and have a destination in mind. You want to maximize the fun on your stolen day, not spend time trying to think of something to do.
2. Call your boss and leave a voice mail message before going to bed. This technique shocked my current co-workers when I first told them that’s what I did. Now they all do it. There’s simply no good reason to wake up early and call when your shift is about to begin. And the last thing you want to do is actually talk to the boss. Voice mail is the way to go. If you have the sort of boss who expects an explanation of your illness, all you need to say is “There are terrible things going on in my stomach. Being in the office would be a bad idea.” Don’t fake coughs, or lie about trips to the hospital. Most employers are mature enough to accept a simple “I won’t be in today.” If yours isn’t, then maybe you should spend your free day job-hunting.
3. Have fun. Have a LOT of fun. Do something you don’t normally get to do, but something you know you’ll enjoy. Don’t call in sick when you’re genuinely sick. If you’re going to be miserable, do it at the office where you’ll already be miserable. Unless you have a serious enough ailment to actually necessitate a sick day, you should use these days as free vacation. Do not, under any circumstances, no matter how important you think you are at work, answer the phone if you don’t know with absolute certainty that the person on the other end is not calling you about work.

If you still need some extra motivation to call in sick and enjoy yourself, let Weird Al be your guide….

Hit my snooze alarm for the 27th time
just don't feel like goin' to work -
I think I'll call my boss, then I'm
Gonna hack and cough and wheeze
Swear I got some strange disease
What's that little twerp gonna say?
Hey

I'm callin' in sick today
Callin' in sick today

I could shine my pennies or clean my lava lamp
I could spend all day in my underwear
watching "Ernest Goes To Camp"
I could sit and count my hair
I could burp my Tupperware
I'm not busy now anyway
Hey

I'm callin' in sick today
Callin' in sick today
Ain't goin' to work, no way
Callin' in sick today

I can do anything I want to
I am invincible now
I'm on fire, baby
I'm alive, I'm alive, can you hear me, world?
I'm alive!

Maybe I'll spend all day staring at the sun
and trying not to squint
Maybe I'll make a huge color tapestry from
my belly button lint
When I'm sick of takin' abuse
I just make up some lame excuse
Freedom's just seven digits away
Hey